Urgh, I am really bad at this! Asking for help that is. I will give of myself until I’m about to fall over, but asking for help. Eish, that is a problem! This picture from writeclicksave describes me very well:
You know that saying ‘When you want something done right, do it yourself’? Well, if you look it up in the dictionary, I’m pretty sure you’ll find a photo of me next to it! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a control-freak, I just like it when things are done the right way, the first time. Being self-reliant, stubborn and independent is a quality which drives the people close to me up the walls and have been reprimanded about this on countless occasions.
Take last weekend for instance. It was pouring down with rain and we were left with watching TV as the only option. I got bored with this and decided that reading was a better option. The book I’m busy with was lying on the other of the couch, next to Jacques. Instead of just asking him to pass it to me, I got up and walked around him to pick it up. “Why don’t you just ask me?” he said. I was (again) sort of perplexed. I simply didn’t think of asking. Why should I ask if I am perfectly capable of just doing it myself? A break in the rain and I decided to take a walk to the shop, instead of just asking the neighbors whether they are going. Result: me, drenched, getting offered a lift by the neighbor. “Why didn’t you ask?” Urgh, I hate asking for stuff!
I get grumpy when I feel like I am not allowed to or am incapable of doing something. If you want me to do something, tell me that I can’t do it. It is this very stupid stubbornness which made me take up smoking! Let me explain. When I was 18 my boyfriend at the time and all our friends were smokers. One day I asked him for a cigarette. He was furious and told me that if I start smoking he will leave me. Hypocrite! Not being one who takes well to this, I marched to the shop and bought my first packet of cigarettes. Not knowing anything about cigarettes at the time, I opted for the nicest looking pack and Gauloises Blonds it was. I coughed for an hour after I lit up, but unfortunately the habit stuck! Stupid girl!
This makes me a very, very, very bad patient. I hate being catered for and am forever getting up to fetch things or make tea or do stuff. I can’t stand it when people, women especially, say they are incapable of doing something. Just do it. Find a way. There is always a way!
Is being self-reliant such a bad thing really? Even worse, is it a matter of misplaced pride? I am a Leo after all!