I promise to never complain about a photo again!

My brother, sister and myself as part of a wedding party

My brother, sister and myself as part of a wedding party

Today I received my technology rescue, the one I have been praying for. The laptop my dad and his wife bought me arrived from the Free State, lovingly packaged by my mom. Along came a book too: Paulo Coelho’s The Zahir. Yay, but for once, the book will have to wait.

I switched on the laptop eager to get started, but that is where the waterworks started. Instead of a desktop image, there was a message from my mom:

“My dear Nanuschka, may this laptop be the start of great things for you. May you one day win the Nobel prize for all the injustices you try and find. May every word you type be to God’s glory and may He bless you in every moment. I am so proud of you!”

What I discovered on the laptop changed my view of photos forever. I have never been a huge fan of photos. I would much rather be behind the shutter capturing the moment than being in the moment. My mom has always been the one to insist on photos. Every event, every occasion had a reason for a photo to be taken. Her requests for photos at these times are always met by complaints, sighs and long faces. It will never happen again. I will be smiling and jumping the queue to get their first.

The photos on there are an heirloom of memories; a treasure chest of family history. I found photos of my brother, sister and myself; photos of my parents dating back to their wedding day in 1972. To the wedding day photo’s Luke commented: Gosh, those guys really got stuck in the 70’s! There are precious, precious photos of Luke – his entire life captured on film. I found photos of my grandparents, my childhood home, my first Christmas tree(!), Saartjie (the cleaner employed by my gran for as long as I can remember). There were even photos of celebrities, gala events and sports teams – all captured by my mom. Old black and white prints of wedding days before color film and antique photos of my grandfather’s first car and first motorbike. It was the first time I had been able to show Luke a picture of my grandfather – it would appear he looks like a German general of the Second World War.

Through these photos I remembered my Oupa getting ready for Sunday church, fights with my brother and moments of hysterical laughter with my sister. I remembered long late night talks with my mom and the smell of dad when he holds me to his chest.

Photos and stories are our links to the past. Treasure them. Without them we have nothing to stir up old memories. Through these photos I could share stories with Jacques and Luke tonight; stories that made me laugh and stories that made me cry.

Thank you to my dad and Theresia for making this day possible.

Thank you to my mom for always being the memory keeper of our family. I now understand!

Have a little faith!


Describe a memory or encounter in which you considered your faith, religion, spirituality — or lack of — for the first time.

Faith is not a light switch. You can not turn it on or off. Either you have it or you don’t.

Since I can remember I have had my faith in God. True, I am only human and sometimes my faith is weaker than at other times, but it is always there. It is that little thing which makes you realize that somehow things will be OK.

I will share two occasions with you which I clearly remember. These occasions differ slightly: On the first one despair won the battle and I gave up on faith. In the second, I relied on my faith to get me through. Both of these set my faith in stone and I know why I believe. Save for one or two people in my family, I have never told anyone, but I feel compelled to share it today.

1992 in a small Free State town.
I had had enough. I was 15 and knew nothing other than the fact that it had to stop. At around 3 in the morning I got up, fetched the gun from the safe and loaded the bullets. The commando training, which he insisted on, finally had a purpose. Safety off. Ready to fire. I held the 9mm Parabellum to his head as he was snoring away in a drunken stupor. I pulled the trigger, nothing. I checked everything, it was all systems go. I pulled the trigger a second time. Nothing. I clearly heard a male voice telling me to stop. It gave me such a fright, I almost dropped the gun. I pulled the trigger a third time. “STOP!!!” the voice boomed in my ear. The gun turned smoldering hot in my hand. I knew it was time to stop.

1999 in Melville Johannesburg
I had just moved into the cottage; it was my first night there and the next day I was to start a new job. Somewhere during the night I woke up because I couldn’t breathe. Someone was sitting on me, choking me. I fought back and struggled to free myself, but he was too strong. There was nothing I could do. I could only make out the edges of his shadow while the long boney fingers dug deeper into my throat. I needed a rescue and shouted in my mind “God please help me!”. An instant later the room lit up and a being, an angel, appeared. He was tall enough for his head and shoulders to stick through the roof. He grabbed the being that was sitting on me by the neck and pulled him off. The creature uttered a blood curdling shriek and then they were gone. I sat up and thought to myself: that was one hectic dream. The next morning and for six days thereafter I was reminded that it was not a dream: the bruises on my neck remained where his fingers had touched me.

I have used this quote many times on my blog, but it is true:

Faith and fear both requires us to believe in something we can not see. Faith will give you a reason to go on. Fear will such the life right out of you. Which do you choose?

That unique hidden side and CHARGERS


As we know, we all have the CREATIVE side. We have that hidden art, which is neglected the most in between routine chaos.


As per me, that’s the only fact, that side of every human being, makes him unique. We all live on same earth, live same life and no one of us have control on end of life. So many ways, we share the similarities. Still we all are different. What it would have taken for GOD to make us all different? He must have thought a lot and then must have smiled J. He must knew that we will or most of us will neglect themselves and so he put that secret uniqueness in the heart and covered it with body. We most of the time, search out side to satisfy our creativity, to accomplish something unequaled in life. And sometimes, we spend the whole life to just…

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The Life You Want

The Dynamic Force

The understanding that there is a better life to live
It drives us on
It makes us stand and seek and try so hard to give
As much as we can

We work hard, or not, but we always think and believe
That there is more
We play our cards, do whatever we can, to try and relieve
That inbuilt draw

No one ever succeeds in finding that secret place alone
We are all confused
The selfishness we hide is never satisfied and always moans
We are being used

Controlled by all kinds of lying thoughts and feelings
They make us blind
To the Truth that comes from God and brings us healing
It renews the mind

There is only One Way to reach that Life that we desire
There is no price
It has already paid by Him and His Name is Jesus Christ
Just bring your life


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Wake up City of Cape Town Traffic – before the children die!


Photo: ER24.com

Every morning while waiting for my taxi I see two light delivery vehicles with canopies transporting school children, stuffed into the back of the vehicles like sardines.

Twice before have I phoned the local Traffic Department with the vehicle registration numbers and on both occasions I was brushed off with “The drivers have been warned to stop transporting the children as they do not have the necessary permits to transport people.”

This morning I saw the vehicles again, only this time it was raining heavily.  The driver of the one vehicle was driving so fast that he was, despite his best efforts, unable to come to a stop at the four-way crossing.  Instead, when he saw that he was not able to stop, he increased his speed!

I have again phoned the Traffic Department and was again met with the obligatory “someone will get back to you”.

I do realize it is very difficult to apprehend someone who is putting the lives of children in danger when you have the location, description and vehicle license number of the offenders, but really?  Do we want to see these innocent children in a picture such as the one above?

Do we need to see an accident happen and the possible loss of children’s lives before something will be done?

Wake up City of Cape Town Traffic!  It is your job, you get paid to do this!